Ford has announced new technology for some of its 2010 model cars that will allow parents to control the top speed of their teenagers’ cars.  As a bonus, they can also limit the volume of kiddies’ stereos and make the car send out constant alert chimes if the seatbelt isn’t getting used.

Nice idea.  Parents, I’m sure, are thrilled at the prospect.  Teens, I’m sure, hate the idea.

My opinion?  It’s a drop in the bucket.  Here’s a better idea:

Make the top speed in every car on the road 80 miles an hour.  I don’t know of anywhere in the country where it’s actually legal to go faster than that, anyway, and for many places, 80 is too fast.  So 80 should be it.  Period.  If 80 isn’t fast enough for you, hop on a plane.

Put a limit on the volume of the stereo on every car on the road.  If I can hear your music outside your car while you have your motor running and all windows sealed tight, it’s too loud.  I don’t care how much you want your mental screws vibrated loose by a strong beat; I shouldn’t have to listen to it with you.  And I assure you:  no one wants to sit through the wild potpourri of music on my iPod.  (The difference is that I don’t rudely and selfishly subject others to my tunes, and I think the world goes on fine without my doing so.)

Make that little seatbelt chime that insistent on every car on the road.  If you really want your teens to follow your orders about wearing a seatbelt, provided them with the advantage of being able to follow by example, not just by order.  Show them how much you personally think a seatbelt makes a difference for you, while you demand it of them.

If we really want to keep drivers safe, we need everyone on the same page, not just younger drivers who feel so cramped their first few years on the road that they spend them looking forward to “going full throttle” once the restrictions go away.