Life

Boneless Chicken Wings Come Under Fire

Dreamstime

A Nebraska man addressed his local leaders about a controversy almost no one else thought of: ‘boneless chicken wings.’

I enjoy a plate of boneless chicken wings every now and then. For me, though, they have to be of the teriyaki variety. I never have cared much for the hot and spicy Buffalo variety.

I prefer the boneless type because you get more chicken meat than you would from actual chicken wing pieces. For some of us, that’s enough of a reason. But the boneless version tends to be a lot less messy when you’re eating. That can make a big difference when you’re eating your lunch at work!

But no matter how much time you spend thinking about chicken wings, I suggest there’s a guy in Nebraska who has spend more time on the subject.

Man calls for change of name at city council meeting

Imagine making the effort to attend your local city council meeting because you want to hear the latest on a topic that might seriously affect your home.

What you hear instead is a man calling for a change to the term “boneless chicken wing.” That’s what happened Monday night in Lincoln, Nebraska. The man told city council members they should remove the “offending” term from menus in the city as well as “from our hearts.”

What did boneless wings ever do to him?

He seems to think — at least he argued — that the term represents a lie to children. That’s because those boneless wings aren’t wings at all. At best, they can only validly be called chicken tenders.

“We have been casually ignoring a problem that has gotten so out of control, that our children are throwing around names and words, without even understanding their true meaning,” he said.

He offered several alternatives for council members to consider:

  • Buffalo-style Chicken Tenders
  • Wet Tenders
  • Saucy Nugs
  • Trash

I have to ask again: What did boneless chicken wings seriously do to this guy for him to resent them so much?

I’m surprised he didn’t argue against the term “Buffalo Wings,” since buffalo do not have wings. (Of course, they were named after the city of Buffalo, not the animal. But this could confuse children, too, right?)

For the record, one council member made an interesting remark after the man’s tirade. You’ll have to check it out here.

Maybe that extra piece of information means he wasn’t serious. The New York Times said the speech was a joke…even though he insists he really wants the name done away with.

In any case, I’m not going to order anything called “Saucy Nugs.”

Does the term boneless chicken wings bother you in any way?

Loading spinner
Patrick is a Christian with more than 29 years experience in professional writing, producing and marketing. His professional background also includes social media, reporting for broadcast television and the web, directing, videography and photography. He enjoys getting to know people over coffee and spending time with his dog.